Courage

Assuming I did cover my apparent challenge of the day during my multiple challenge entry before this, I shall just shoot on ahead and speak about whatever I have got to go around sharing about. Today's topic is simply put...memories and the courage to remember.

I remember when I started out on this blog, it used to be called something uber cliche like "Life and Lies Through My Eyes" or something along that line until I switched over to "Elie Says" about 6 months later and after a year with that name, I decided to rename my blog Shneep's Corner with a painstakingly self-drawn on Adobe Illustrator header. I guess the only thing that has never changed is my blog URL because it was derived from the one man whose brother had inspired me to keep writing and has told me never to stop after reading a simply eulogy that I had put up on my old and pre-loved blog that has since turned private.

Today marks the 2nd year in which this very man has left us and he is none other than the very legendary Mr. Swithin Monteiro. I never knew the reason behind why you never drove a car or always appeared to have free time in your hands. I loved how you spoke about the dog you had and how he had come to your life; as though he was just there for you to pick up and care for. And that was who you always were. A man with a smile so warm that it hurts to not smile back and a man who hugs us back the very moment we hug your giant figure with warmth. The news of your stroke came as a shock to me and your death an even bigger one. While I regret that I have never gotten the opportunity to tell you a whole lot of things, I believe in the days that I look up the skies and that you are staring right back to see me achieve them the way you would have liked for me to do in the PR line. You probably wouldn't be THAT glad to see me switch on my majors midway but I know you'd encourage me either way. Thank you, Uncle Swithin and ultimately, Uncle Sandy (If you're reading this) for telling me never to give up after reading the eulogy I have pieced together for Uncle Swithin. I would have stopped writing without your words because I felt that my fire had burned out. Thanks for changing the wick in me and for pouring just a lot more fuel into my furnace for a brighter flare. It's amazing, and I owe it to you.

The best picture taken of Uncle Swithin that I could find all over the internet.
Him and that Beatles shirt.

An excerpt from what I've written 2 years ago for you in my private blog that Uncle Sandy has read through:

It has dawned to me that another has left my life. A person who had come in, left an imprint and followed the path everyone will go to. And I wouldn't lie when I say that I am in a denial state of mind. I don't want to believe in the fact that another person has just walked out like that. I hate change. I hate having to face death and I hate having to be in funerals. That eerie silence doesn't scare me anymore. That big coffin doesn't scare me anymore. It's that feeling...that solemn,solitary memory and fear that you will forget the person laying dead and stone cold in the casket painted so professionally that hits me hard. I'm afraid to forget how people looks like. I'm afraid to forget how people sounds like. I'm afraid to forget how people act like. Every movement. Every inching. Every word. Every smile. It all matters and I'm terrified that one day I will forget them all. 
I'll crank up every Black Sabbath and Eagles CD I find in my father's collection, dear Uncle Swithin. Because every of those CDs were a gift from you. Whether on special occasions or on random day visits, we were sure to leave your house with a CD. You were a man of music, a man of greatness that has left too soon. One day we shall meet for your crabs and wine. That's a promise from your Pocahontas to you. Thank you for having been in my life as I grew up. And I'm sorry we never kept in touch. All it took was a call, but now its too late for my tears. Walk on, Mr.Swithin Monteiro; for one day we shall meet again. Till one day, your crabs will be cooked and the wine would be poured. Black Sabbath would be playing in the background; a CD you appear to love a lot. Go on, Mr.Swithin Monteiro. You have left us now. But you're not leaving us forever.
 So cheers it shall be, Mr. Monteiro.

And that, I have felt for all these 2 years regardless when I hear a Black Sabbath or Eagles song. It would have been your 61st birthday on the 25th of February and here I wish you a Happy Birthday, regardless where you may be with your contagious smile and warm hug. We miss you here, Uncle Swithin. And life just moves as though nothing has happened while our hearts bleed in silence.

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